In our generation, one in twelve teen girls self harm. People aware of the situation think it’s only logic to make their parents aware of the catastrophe so that they can get help, but is that the right thing to do?
Nobody should ever feel so helpless to have to resort to self-harm, but if they do, and somebody finds out about it, in my opinion, that person needs to either keep it to themselves, or try to help with the problem by using their own knowledge. I don’t, however, consider it acceptable to get the parents of the individual involved without their permission, because depending on the situation, that could lead to many things. Yes, this person clearly needs help, but in the opinion of the person self-harming, it is in their best interest to solve it themselves, without the help of an adult.
An anonymous source quoted, “I’m very worried about my best friend and I know I need to help her, but how? Should I tell her parents, or would that just complicate things? She said if they found out she would never speak to me again.” Do you, as a friend, put yourself in that position, or do you fulfill your friend’s request?
In some self-harm situations, the person hurting themselves will eventually be thankful for the help they got on your behalf, but in other cases, they will grow to resent you for telling their secret, for making it impossible for them to escape from the emotional pain through the physical. If your best friend trusted you enough to express their darkest feelings and secrets to you and then you betray them, they will feel completely alone. The only person they thought they could confide in proved them wrong. Of course it would only be for their benefit, but when somebody is in that state, they don’t think logically, they think selfishly, wondering how someone who they thought was their best friend could go and deceive them completely in their time of need, when of course, you would be doing quite the opposite. Although it is evident as to where the person getting their friend help is coming from, my logic is that if someone really wanted help and was determined to get better, they would ask for it themselves, and until they are ready to do so, they need to be left alone, and allowed to deal with their sadness their own individual way.
The concept of keeping a friendship or keeping a life is a complicated one, and everybody’s logic on the subject can be varied, for many different reasons. However, this depends on what your priorities are, and the severity of the case. If you’ve been in the situation of the person self-harming, you may be more sensitive to their feelings and understanding on the situation, but if this is new to you, and you feel helpless, an adult may be the last resort in your mind, especially without knowing the severity of the situation, and what might happen to the person if you don’t help. Imagine you tell their parents and it ends badly, imagine you don’t and it ends their life. What decision would you make, what do you think is right?